How Are You?
by FanFicQueen223
Summary: Will he return? No one knows. I mean he visits once in a blue moon but to me he feels distant, out of reach. He sends me letters but it's always the same "how are you?" Or "how was your day?" I don't understand. Maybe he doesn't understand what it means to be by someone's side. WARNING: THIS BOOK IS VERY REALISTIC AND TALKS ABOUT THE WORLDS PROBLEM; BEWARE
1. Chapter 1

I sat. That's all I did nothing more nor nothing less. If you think that it's boring then wait until the story gets to Kaneki's POV which will never happen. Let's face it he'll never come back...especially after I punched him. I regret it (maybe)

but it happened (he deserved it) but I would say sorry but he's gone (so glad!) I feel sort of bad. Anyway, the same letter came and as always it was... DING! DING! DING! You got it correct the answer was: boring. It's always the same. Nothing changes.  
/I guess I mine as well write a letter back... again.

* * *

Dear Kaneki,

I didn't know what to write so I send good luck to you on your um killing sprees and stuff like that.

From,

Touka

P.S. I DIDN'T WRITE THIS OF MY FREE WILL

P.P.S. Everyone says hi and that you should come 'home'

P.P.P.S. I'm rolling my eyes right now

* * *

 **DEAR WHATS YOUR FACES,**

 **CONGRATZ YOU HAVE GOTTEN PAST THE FIRST CHAPTER OF "HOW ARE YOU" (minus 6 of the caps) I SEND YOU PILES AND PILES OF FUCKINGDUMB IMAGINARY CLOVERS**

 **FROM,**

 **TOUKA**


	2. Another One

(I lied)

KANEKI'S POV

It had been almost a year since I left Anteiku. I don't know if it was a smart or I was being a complete dumbass. Mistakes were made and now I have to finish what I started.

*epic theme music*

No! No! Stop the music! I'm not a hero or some cool epic villian! Though that would be nice but I'm just a guy who's gone down the wrong path so yeah. You-you can play the music.

*epic theme music continues*

I always enjoyed writing letters to Anteiku not just Touka but everyone I guess you can say it's a hobby. As you know my others hobbies are reading and well do I have any other hobbies. Maybe. I don't really know. I guess my hobby is wondering if I have  
/any hobbies *slow clapping* anyway *still clapping* okay okay thank you thank you. Thank you. STOP THE CLAPPING! Anyway life's been rough ya know with my BFFL dying and me practically abandoning my hopes and dreams to become some merciless assasin.  
/Let's just say nothings new. Instead of blaming me on my very horrible choices I blame THE DUMB JACKASS THAT TURNED ME INTO THIS! Yes blah blah blah we all know who I'm talking about right? Jason. J-Jason was the dudes name and let me tell you he  
/wasn't very lively!Am I right? Yeah I should be a comedian. With the hope of new seasons and by new seasons I mean Summer Spring Fall Winter or maybe it's Speing Summer Fall Winter? I don't know the answer to that either. Let's face it I'm not  
/one to talk. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! The least you can do is laugh like seriously. Where was I? Oh! I'm getting off topic again... **silly me**. Oh! Sorry my voice went a little creepy. Anyway enough talk. I got some heads to add.

1 Hour Later...

Phew! That was sort of a close call (not really) I can't believe we won (we actually sort of lost) and I defeated an officer (was really weak) it was easy (it was easy) so easy. **Kaneki.** Oh you again. **You need to stop fighting me. Use me. Use me. Use me. Use me. Use me.** Gosh  
Kakuja's these days ,am I right! Yause it once and then they think that there king of your whole body. Crazy. **I'm not crazy! Your crazy!** Yeah yeah blah blah blah balogna! **Don't ignore me!** I CANNOT HEAR YOU! WOW DO YOU HEAR A VOICE  
SOMEWHERE!? **Your so immature!** I'm you so your immature too! **Don't give me that bullshit!** Yadda yadda yadda that'sall I hear! **I CANNOT TAKE THIS!** Wait! Stop! Our time is up. Time to write our ending letter.

/Dear people,

I, Kaneki, have enjoyed my time talking and interacting with you. **DIE! DIE! BURN!** Shut up! Don't mind him. He's crazy let's face it. Anyway congratz on getting past the 1st actual chapter of 'How Are You?' I bet your excited! Anyway have a great  
day! Anything to say? **Yeah yeah have a great day blah blah blah.**

 ****

From,  
Kaneki & **Kaneki**


	3. This is getting boring

Touka here! Welcome fellow um Jackasses. I mean... THIS IS MY ARMY CAMP AND YOUR GONNA LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY! IF DON'T THEN YOU'LL uhhhh REGRET IT DEEPLY! I WILL PUNCH YOU IN DA FACE! Hahahaha! Joking joking especially since I'm not one to punch *shows  
all her punching moments* okay maybe I am but still. I bet Kaneki's doing great right now. Probably bored. The key word is _probably._ Ya neverknow with that freak of nature. Am I right? Of course I'm right. Now I will tell you about my  
day.  
*reads in boring voice*  
Today was great. I got to go for a walk then went back here and now I'm here talking to all you guys out there.

* * *

I 100% bet you read that in a really boring voice but if you didn't then that okay too. Now I understand I this story is a parody. Making fun of Tokyo Ghoul. Don't get me wrong I LOVE TOKYO GHOUL! Hearts for days! Uh never mind. So how was  
your day? OH! I forgot that I don't care about you or YOUR STUPID FUCKING FEELINGS! That's right! Me, myself, and I that'sall Iever need in life ...

*crickets*

I'm a complete loner.


End file.
